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  • Kativa Nashay

Breaking Up Isn't hard to do (5 ways to help let go of unhealthy relationships)



Being in a relationship can be hard work, but being in an unhealthy relationship is much harder, and sometimes no matter how many red flags and signs we see, it can still be so hard to just leave it behind. There can be many reasons why you find yourself stuck in unhealthy relationships, such as having attachment issues, not wanting to start over, or be alone, etc. However you have to make a conscious decision to do what's best for YOU, your peace of mind and sanity. With that being said, breaking up isn't hard to do at all, its the result of that in which makes it more difficult to follow through. Here are 5 ways to help let go of an unhealthy relationship.


1. Recognizing Its Unhealthy: Recognizing that your relationship is unhealthy is the starting point. Its here when you realize what don't want to deal with, what you no longer can deal with and what you want and expect from a good healthy relationship. Its so easy to try to look at potential, and try to see the best in people. However when the bad outweighs the good, its most likely an unhealthy relationship.


2. Cut off Contact: It is so important to cut off contact with the person you are trying to detach from. Keeping in touch with them, will only make it more difficult to move on, and prolong the healing process. Cutting off contact also includes cutting off stalking them on social media, avoiding hanging out in places they may be, deleting pictures, videos, text threads etc. You don't want anything that allows you to reminisce.


3. Accept Reality: The sooner you accept your situation for what it is, the easier It will be to know that moving on is the best thing to do for you. When accepting it for what it is, you are making your decision based off of facts. When you accept the truth, you live the truth. Instead of thinking of what things could have been, focus on what they actually ARE. At the end of the day life is about changes, and realities change as well. What somethings was and what it is now are two different things.


4. Surround Yourself w/ positivity: Its very important to stay postive, Its very easy to fall into depressions trap, and feel defeated. However before that happens surround yourself with positivity, wether it be your family and friends, or being alone and meditating, and practicing self graditude. Its very important to stay strong and positive and remember that all feelings are temporary.


5.Give yourself closure: It's very much a myth that closure is nessecary when ending a relationship. It is very important that you create closure for yourself, no one can do that for you. Theres absolutely no reason for you to need to "talk" with someone one last time, If the relationship is ending. All of the talking and communication should have been done in the relationship. Therefore you have to create your own closure, have a conversation with yourself, reflect on what you could have done better in the relationship, why you think it went the way It did. etc. Closure is done on your own terms, no one can give you that except YOURSELF.


Finial Thought


If a relationship doesn't feel right, then most likely it isn't right, and it may be time for you to make a decision for yourself. I recently read something that said "If you think I'm the problem, then you have to change me. If you realize that you're the problem, then you can change yourself, learn something and grow wiser. Most people want everyone else in the world to change themselves........ It's easier to change yourself than everyone else.” I quote that to say It becomes our own problem when we decide to overlook red flags, disrespect, neglect, etc. Its up to us to change our current situations, to better change our future, instead of waiting on someone else to change. In the end all you can do Is forgive yourself and them, and move forward. As I stated before, feelings are temporary, with time everything changes, and all pain heals. It takes a lot of courage to step up, and do what has to be done, but IT CAN BE DONE.